Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Student Loan Scandal Shocks Our Lady of Notre Dame
Executive Vice President John Affleck-Graves reportedly stole $58,984 last year in eight months as director of Student Loan Corp., a lender to ND's students and parents. That firm is tied to Citibank, which Notre Dame "strongly" recommends to students.
This is not the first time, nor will it be the last time, that something has been stolen from Our Lady of Notre Dame. Tomorrow evening, when the BIG EAST Fighting Irish step inside the Rock and do battle with our beloved Seton Hall Pirates, they’ll be lucky if they come away with their socks on. Because not only will their pride be gone, but their shoes, jerseys, and shorts will surely be missing by halftime.
In honor of National Signing Day tomorrow, I would like to revisit a former Notre Dame star who has completely lost all dignity – Brady Quinn. Without taking a single meaningful snap in his entire career, Mr. Quinn has managed to land wonderful commercials which feature him throwing subs to fans (ironically the same number of sandwiches he throws is the exact number of completions he has had in his bleak, professional career) to drinking some form of steroids, er, muscle supplement. Congratulations Marsha, you’ve really made it.
So as the Pirates get set to prove who’s boss in this battle of elite Catholic universities, look for Seton Hall to steal the ball from Haranchode-y because he’ll be too busy pulling up his shorts…?
Seton Hall – 84
O.L.N.D - 1